Holdig On To My Faith


My name is Anna Faith Johnson I'm 27 years old with 2 kids, one 9 and the other 2 both sweet girls. I was recently living with my mother and she has now kicked me out of the house. i have no where to go no car and no job. I live in Cleveland OH its been in the single digits the last 3 days. My daughters are safe my eldest living with her father and the youngest still residing with my mom, which she said she would look after till i got on my feet. The last 3 days i have been out in the cold till about 9pm at night. I've been wearing 2 layers of clothes to keep me warm. Aside from my 2 layers of clothes the only thing that has kept me warm and alive is God and the gift I was given to be able to pray to him. I have been through so much which has caused me stress and anxiety. At the tender age of just 14 I got my first job at a local clothing store only to be raped by my manager several months later. I stayed in school played soccer and basketball and made honor roll in high school. When I was 17 I had my first daughter Layla after that I worked at Nordstroms for a year then went back to high school to finish graduating with honors and keeping a part time job at Childrens Place. I have always been able to find a decent job but slowly and surely the rape and the fact i was adopted at 3 months started to get to me. I have been struggling to overcome rape, adoption, death and being cheated on by my daughters father both of them. I have for years of struggling only found peace in God on and off my whole life. I have always been passionate about spirituality and will read about whatever religion i can get my hands on, but mostly staying close to a catholic faith for it is the religion I was raised in. I do love all religions though i compare them to a beautiful garden with every flower you can imagine, for you might love the rose but I do love the calla lily for its simple grace and beauty. But my point being is that the religion you choose is just like choosing a flower from the garden, but all the flowers are sweet and beautiful. Each religion is a different flower and a garden would not be as beautiful if it didn't have such a variety of fragrances, colors and shapes. You pick the flower that speaks to you. I have had good jobs on and off only to find myself distraught with anxiety. Most recently I have went to doctors to help me only to be prescribed medicine that I generally have a very bad reaction to. The latest one causing my mother to kick me out which I do not blame her for. I will always love my mom she adopted me loved me and raised but I didn't want her to push me away I feel like I needed her to help me. I miss seeing my daughters everyday. I miss my eldest daughters one dimple which I tell her is where God kissed her before her gave her to me, and my youngest beauty in and out she is a precious gem. I love them both equally and just as much as I love God. This very story bringing me to tears as I sit in the library pouring out my problems to you. All I have left is my Faith and thank God that my father gave me that middle name for I don't know if I would have any faith if it wasn't for him. He passed away 5 years ago suddenly after he fell and got a head injury which he died from 3 days later. In this same 12 rolling months I also lost my Grandmother whom I loved dearly. I am again reminded of how much I loved them as I sit typing this letter finding myself crying in the public library as I have to once again revisit memory lane. My throat goes dry and I hope that no one sees these tears rolling down my face. I wipe them away only to have them return. I have God and my my giving key that's about all I have left. As I've been flung into homelessness childlessness joblessness and sorrow I realize that the anxiety from my previous downfalls could have simply been overcome by a strong belief in God and a day filled with prayers and meditation. I have tried to call friends and family but with no avail. I am at the end of my road with no where to go but to You(The Giving Keys). How did i find you, you may wonder. On my walk to the library I passed a store called Simply Charming and meet a women filled with God and light named Bri. It is a very spiritual store which is what initially grabbed my attention. I walked in i had about $60.00 bucks in my pocket and I wanted to get my little daughter a figurine for her collection I had started for her, I was to visit my daughter at the library that day at 2pm. Bri directed me to this little angel that was 80% off which cost about 2.95 which was great! Then when at the register I noticed your key necklaces. I walked over and saw the one with my middle name on it FAITH it said on the key. The only thing I had left so i purchased it although I knew that meant going hungry till I found a friend or someone to call on for some food. Bri told me about what The Giving Key does and I thought this was God speaking to me again through his little miracles. So because of what you do I support you and also ask for a help. I have no where to go and no food to eat. I cry because I miss my daughters father grandmother. I miss the loving security that my mother once offered me I miss my family I miss the warmth of the summer sun, and lately tears and God have been my only friends . My necklace gives me hope in the cold that after the winter the summer must come, and this is how I look at my life holding on to the next day knowing that God brings grace, life, warmth, and light. My necklace reminds me to have FAITH! Be strong and God will provide like he does for the birds he gives them food warmth and light. I hold on to a Matthew 6:25-34
25“For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26“Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? 27“And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life? 28“And why are you worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, 29yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. 30“But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? You of little faith! 31“Do not worry then, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear for clothing?’ 32“For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. 33“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 34“So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.