My original word wasn't remain with a semi-colon as the i. My original key read "brave". Brave because the Lord was asking my husband and I to move our family of 6 across the Atlantic to serve at an orphanage in South Africa. Brave because I'm just not. Brave because I needed the Lord to make it so.
I had my key for a long time and for the long journey and I had many discussions about it with my friends and family. One friend struggled with this word. She said she could never be brave. As I hugged her for the last time, I felt the strong urge to hand her my key...give her the reminder to just be brave. But I didn't. I needed this key. I n e e d e d to be brave.
So I crossed the ocean, moved into a new house and held my littles close. And every time I tried to wear the Brave key...I just couldn't. Because it was no longer my word. It was no longer my key. Little did I know I would have another chance to hand her my key.
Two weeks after arriving in Africa, my little sister died. In her sleep. By herself. Alone.
And I borded a plane to take me back to the States. And I stood next to the casket holding my first friend, my baby sister, the one who was always brave.
My friend entered the visitation at the back of the room. And waited through an hour long line to hug me. And I held my key...my brave...until I hugged her again. I slipped that key into her hand, told her it was time for her to be brave...time to let the Lord make her B R A V E. And time for me to search for a new word.
The Lord has asked me to continue. To keep going. Without the familiar of the States. Without my familiar friends. Without my familiar family. Without my baby sister. He has asked me to remain.
That semi-colon for the i is because my story doesn't end here. I wrap myself in my baby sisters favorite color, orange; and I rema;n. That the world may know Him. That He may be glorified. That I can be brave as I step one foot in front of the other...moment by moment. Breath by breath. I can rema;n.