November 03, 2014
For The Sole Purpose Of Giving It Away
I guess my story isn't THAT big of a deal, but I figure I should share it anyway.
I had ordered my first key (double sided, one said Breathe and the other said Courage) back in March. I picked those words because i needed them as reminders because often I have had a hard time believing in myself, and having courage to be who I truly am. I also, like probably everyone on the planet, have this awful social anxiety and I deal with a lot of that when I go to school. The words helped me stand up for myself. They helped me relax, they kept me sane.
So, I had very little intention of giving my key away (i know that's so crappy, but I just really loved the key and wanted it forever & i knew i would never meet someone who would give me one and wow this sounds so selfish. anyway...) a few months later I started listening to this awesome band and I became a huge fan and followed them and some fans of them on twitter and the whole bit. This one girl I followed, I noticed, struggled with self-harm, possibly depression, self-image issues...the whole nine yards. I had sent a message on twitter one night, after she admitted to self-harming and checked in with her. I knew she was a stranger but she was hardly 16 and hurting herself and I know what it's like to be so young and to hate absolutely everything about yourself. So i reached out to her, she assured me she was fine, we talked for a little, and I kept in touch whenever I felt like she needed help.
It was after that first message did I realize that I may want to give this key away. I wasn't sure if we would ever meet, but I always kept it in the back of my mind. A bunch of fans from this band that we like hold meet-ups for other fans in a local area, so I knew if I ever did want to meet her I could go to a meet-up and make a bunch of new friends & give her the key, etc; but I still wasn't sure.
A few weeks (or months?) later, I found out she was struggling again. We talked more, she was doing okay but not really okay. It was the kind of "yeah, I'm okay" you give as a response after you've cried for like, an hour and gave yourself a headache.
Finally in August that band we like was coming around and giving a concert. We agreed to meet up before the show & I told her i had something for her.
We met in line and hugged and talked and I explained the concept of the key. How when she feels like it's right, she should give it away. I told her I didn't need the key anymore (and weirdly enough, I really don't. Like I'm not afraid to be who I am and to stand up for myself. and often I wonder if this key really DID help me and save me). I told her why the words helped me and how I hope they do the same for her.
We hugged again, took a picture and keep in touch.
Thank you for doing this. The giving keys do change and help people. I hope I helped her the way that key helped me. I hope to buy another one soon, for the sole purpose of giving it away.