I lost my sister to alcoholism six years ago and there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of her and miss her.
My now 13-year-old goddaughter was born with a heart as big and unique as her mama’s. Last Thursday, I got to go have dinner with her by myself, which is rare because she lives out of town. All of a sudden her eyes welled up with tears and it hit me: "You don’t remember her, do you?” She shook her head through tear-filled eyes and said no. She remembers some things but not her smell or the way she sounded. She remembers stories but didn’t remember what her arms felt like. I am the closest thing to my sister, and it’s my honor to help her know the mama who loved her so much.
The next morning, I heard in my head that I needed to give my FAITH key to Emilie. Honestly, I was a bit bratty when I realized this, and I tried to bargain that I’d buy her a new FAITH key. I wasn’t ready to give mine up. I still needed FAITH. Then I heard in my head again, "No! You need to give Emilie YOUR key." My eyes welled up with tears and I fell to my knees sobbing. I always listen to Pandora while getting ready and all of a sudden, “I Can Only Imagine” by Mercy Me came on. This was Kristin’s favorite song and I knew that I had to do what I was instructed to do and take care of her daughter.
Emilie was leaving to go back home that afternoon, so I took the opportunity to take her hands in mine, look into her eyes, and pay forward my faith key. I told her to hold the key whenever she needed to feel that she is loved immeasurably and to know that her mom is always near. I also told her that she had to pay it forward when the time was right.
By giving Emilie faith, I had FAITH. Now, I am buying a mini key with LOVE, as there is so much LOVE to share!